Living a Lie Read online

  One day she hoped he might see that. One day, in the future, they might find each other again. With all her heart, she hoped so. But if one day it was too late, if one day he found someone new and forgot all about her, if that day ever came, she had only herself to blame.

  “I was afraid the authorities would say no to my having you here.”

  Mildred’s quiet voice intruded on Kitty’s thoughts.

  “If it hadn’t been for you, helping me clean out this place and making me respectable, giving me the confidence to face them well, I’m certain they would have turned me down and sent you to the foster parents.”

  “That was a lifetime ago.” At least it seemed that way to Kitty.

  Mildred shook her head.

  “When you walked through that door with your few belongings I never dreamed you’d be allowed to stay. Nor that you would really want to.” She frowned, obviously agitated as she pleated the edge of the tablecloth.

  “I’ve never done right by you.” Mildred had so many regrets.

  Smiling, Kitty put her at ease.

  “Like I said…a lifetime ago.”

  Mildred regarded her with pride.

  “Look at you now though…a woman any man would die for.” Certainly Kitty had blossomed. Slim and pert, with the same elfin face and shining brown eyes, long dark hair loose to her shoulders and a smile to dazzle even the darkest day, she was exquisite.

  “In a little over three months you’ll be eighteen Mildred reckoned.

  “Time flies,” Kitty mused aloud. In fact these many months had sped by so swiftly it was frightening.

  Mildred was suddenly pacing the room.

  “I’ll always be ashamed I didn’t come to your fourteenth birthday party,” she insisted.

  “And we couldn’t afford a party for your sixteenth But we can afford one now.” Excited she spun round.

  “How about if I put on a party for your birthday next March?” Once the idea took hold she wouldn’t let it go.

  “Oh Kitty! It would be wonderful! The biggest party this house has ever seen!”

  She stared at Kitty with eager eyes. “It’s time we had a party. Time we celebrated. I’m finally and permanently shut of a two-timing husband. I’m satisfied the kids are all right without their mother, and for the time being at least, I’ve managed to fend off my ex-husband’s greedy idea that I should sell this house.” The fight was still ongoing, but with Kitty’s support, Mildred had been as stubborn as he was.

  “What do you think. Kitty? Shall we have a party on your birthday?”

  Kitty wasn’t keen, but she didn’t want to dash Mildred’s spirit.

  “Whatever makes you happy,” she agreed.

  “But you don’t like the idea?” Mildred’s smile fell.

  “I’m not too sure about it,” Kitty confessed.

  “But if you want a party, we’ll have a party.” Right now it was the last thing she wanted. She remembered the other party. Harry had been there.

  Mildred sensed there was something troubling Kitty.

  “All right,” she said, “you don’t have to decide now. There’s plenty of time. We’ll leave it till the New Year. See how you feel then?”

  Kitty was grateful.

  “Let’s enjoy Christmas first. After that, I promise I’ll think about it.”

  “Fair enough.” Mildred knew better than to insist. Experience had shown Kitty had a mind of her own.

  She glanced at the clock.

  “I’d best get ready. I don’t want to keep Jack waiting.”

  “I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”

  “You’re right,” Kitty admitted.

  “Jack Harper is the most patient man I’ve ever met…too accommodating by half. He should be more assertive.” More like Harry, she thought. But then, Jack was Jack and Harry was Harry, and they were as different as chalk from cheese.

  Realising Kitty had again lapsed into deep thought, Mildred wondered, “Do you ever think about that other young man? On the odd occasion when I visited your mother, I seemed to recall you and the boy were close friends.”

  Kitty was astonished her aunt should remember, especially when she herself had made a point of never mentioning his name. When she answered, her smile gave nothing away.

  “You mean Harry Jenkins?”

  “That’s right. His mother was a great friend of…” Mildred bit her tongue. It didn’t seem right to mention Lucinda.

  “It’s all right,” Kitty assured her.

  “As you say, Mrs. Jenkins was a friend of my mother’s. And Harry…well, I haven’t heard from him in ages.” She didn’t admit that was of her own choosing. That was something between her and Harry, a private thing, like the way they felt about each other.

  “People grow up. They change, and all too easily forget old friends.”

  Mildred sounded resentful.

  “Sometimes that’s the best way,” Kitty suggested. Leaning on her elbows she took a precious moment to let herself indulge in old memories. Sometimes it was good to let the past wash over you.

  “Harry Jenkins was a handsome young man As I recall.”

  “You recall right.”

  “Water under the bridge, eh?”

  “Something like that.” Nothing at all like that. Kitty thought. But she couldn’t bring herself to talk about Harry, not with her aunt. Not with anyone.

  “What time is Jack collecting you?”

  Kitty’s brown eyes swept the clock. It was quarter to nine.

  “In about an hour.”

  “Hardly ideal weather for trying out a boat.” Mildred peered out of the window. The sky was dark and ominous.

  “Wouldn’t surprise me if it rained cats and dogs all day.”

  Kitty laughed.

  “Then we’ll find out whether it leaks.”

  “And you might end up in the sea as well.”

  “In that case, I’m sure Jack will decide against buying the boat.”

  Still chuckling, she got out of her seat and began clearing the breakfast things.

  “I’ll wash, you wipe.”

  “You’ll do no such thing.” Mildred quickly gathered the crockery.

  “You do more than your share as it is. Anyway, I’m on afternoon shift, so I’ve time to spare.” She paused to smile at Kitty.

  “Whoever would have thought I’d end up as supervisor in a sweet factory?”

  “You like it though, don’t you?” Kitty too had been astonished when Mildred saw the advert and decided to go for it. Since starting at Metrix, she had gone from strength to strength. Now she had vitality in her step, had regained her trim figure, and though she had a few grey hairs, was a neat, attractive woman of not quite fifty.

  “I love my job,” she replied.

  “Now you’d better hurry, or he’ll be here and you won’t be ready.” She paused and looked up.

  “Kitty?”

  “What?” She was on her way out of the door.

  “Is it serious…with Jack, I mean?”

  Kitty thought a minute. She liked Jack. Since the first day she had started as invoice clerk in his father’s boat and chandlery business, Jack had been a real friend. But she didn’t love him. How could she?

  “It’s not serious on my part,” she said. It was on his. She knew that, and it bothered her.

  “Why do you ask?”

  “Because I’m nosy,” Mildred laughed.

  “And because I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”

  “Don’t worry. He knows the score.”

  “And what’s that?”

  “He knows I don’t feel the same way…never could.”

  “Jack Harper is a good man. He’s also a good catch…with a share in his father’s boat business, two cars, and a cottage in West Bay!”

  “I didn’t realise I’d told you so much about him.”

  “Ah! You see what I mean? He’s on your mind without your even realising it. It’s only a matter of time before he grows on you.”

  Kitty
smiled.

  “I see. Trying to marry me off before I’m even seventeen?”

  Mildred was shocked.

  “What a thing to say!”

  “Well, for your information I have no immediate plans to get married.”

  No plans at all in fact. For the moment she was content to let life carry her along where it fancied.

  “You may not have plans to marry, but what about your boss?”

  Kitty had no answer to that. She merely dismissed the subject with a cheeky wink before departing to get ready for her date.

  A short time later a silver Jaguar drew up outside the house and a young man stepped out.

  “He’s here!” Kitty had been watching through the window.

  “See you later,” she called.

  “Good luck!” Mildred heard the door slam.

  “Stay on your guard, Kitty,” she murmured, waving through the window as they drove away.

  “He might be wealthy, but he’s also very lonely. From what you’ve told me he usually gets what he wants, and as far as I can see he idolises the ground you walk on.” She turned from the window.

  “Wealthy, lonely and besotted with you. He wants you but you’re not sure whether you want him. Someone is bound to get hurt.”

  Shaking her head she returned to her housework.

  “I’d say there was a dangerous situation brewing.”

  Mildred didn’t know how right she was.

  The long drive to Elsworth took them along the busy A34, then through pretty little villages where the traffic slowed and the scenery was breathtakingly beautiful.

  Kitty loved travelling.

  “It was good of you to bring me along,” she said.

  “Though I expect my work will pile high while I’m gone, and the phone won’t stop ringing.”

  “Dad can answer the phone. It won’t hurt him to stay out of the yard for a day and sit behind a desk. It might make him realise how hard you have to work.” Smiling, Jack glanced at her.

  “Who knows? He might even be persuaded to give you a pay-rise.”

  “I’ve just had a pay-rise.” Laughing she remarked, “Though I wouldn’t say no to another if he insisted.”

  They both knew it was unlikely. Ted Harper was a generous employer, but he stuck rigidly by his rules. He had four men and two women on his payroll, and any pay-rise was given on the last day in November, or not at all.

  Settling back in her seat, Kitty quietly regarded her companion. Jack Harper was twenty-eight years old; she only knew that because his father had mentioned it when Kitty was first recruited. He was enthusiastic, hardworking and generous to a fault. An only child, he had been showered with both love and material things, though as a man, and junior partner in his father’s firm, he earned everything he owned.

  Kitty had detected only one small, puzzling flaw in his character.

  There were times when Jack seemed unsure of himself, anxious and almost desperate to please. It was an odd thing, especially as his parents doted on him. It was inconceivable that he should have any money worries, and he was happy in his work so much so that he worked all hours God sent and, while he had enjoyed many lighthearted liaisons with members of the opposite sex, had never embarked on a serious relationship, let alone considered marriage.

  Peeping at him now. Kitty couldn’t help but recall her aunt’s well-meaning teasing. And she was right of course. Jack had got his sights set on her, even though she had made it plain she was neither old enough nor ready for a serious encounter with anyone. Not even Harry. She wondered what it was about her that had made Jack interested. Somehow she didn’t believe he was after a one night stand.

  Like so many times before, she couldn’t help but compare him with Harry. Where Harry was dark-eyed, Jack had eyes as blue as the sky.

  Harry was tall and muscular. Jack was of medium height and square-set.

  His hair was bleached by the sun, and he had the lightest sprinkling of freckles on his forehead.

  Where Harry was quiet and assertive, Jack talked a lot, impressing his customers with his vast knowledge of boats; he knew every make afloat and had learned the technical details off by heart. He revelled in passing on this information.

  Kitty knew very little about boats; her job at the chandlery kept her well and truly in the office, where she made out the invoices and appeased the customers when they rang up to query delivery dates and the like. She did have a smattering of knowledge though, such as the back of the boat was the ‘stern’ and the front was the ‘bow’ or ‘fore’ and ‘aft’ as the sailors said. She knew the bedrooms were called ‘cabins’ and had learned a little jargon concerning the parts that were fitted from the boatyard, like the radar that guided them, or the sounding equipment that might detect submerged debris and thereby avert a collision. The window of her office looked out over the yard, and from here she could see the men at work, cleaning, stripping and refurbishing engines and boats. Ted Harper chose his workers carefully. They were skilled and industrious, and widely respected in the boat trade.

  The Harper yard was one of the busiest around, making more money and selling more boats than any other locally. Jack and his father dealt in used and new boats, and travelled far and wide if there was a bargain to be had. They were trusted by buyer and seller alike. Kitty recalled one man in particular, who waited months for the right boat to be found for him. When Jack located one berthed in Malta, he and his father flew out there and sailed it home. It was bought for six thousand pounds, sold to the man for ten. He then paid another two thousand pounds to have it completely refitted. When he sailed it away it looked like new. Jack and his father had made a healthy four thousand profit on the sale and a further five hundred pounds on the refitting.

  “Everyone’s satisfied,” Jack told Kitty.

  “That’s what you call good business.”

  “What kind of boat are you hoping to buy today?” she asked as he pulled up at traffic lights.

  “A Sealine cruiser,” he answered. “Apparently the owner has just remarried and his wife doesn’t like sailing. The boat has been in dock ever since.”

  “Have you a buyer for it?”

  Surprised, he turned to her.

  “Listen to you,” he chuckled delightedly.

  “You’re already talking like a chandler’s wife.”

  Embarrassed, she turned her attention to their surroundings. They were driving along a narrow lane, with high grass banks and trees that spread their branches over the hedge. Ahead the willows had formed an arch over the road.

  “It looks just like a tunnel,” Kitty remarked.

  “Isn’t it beautiful!”

  His hand reached out to touch hers.

  “I wouldn’t know,” he murmured.

  “I’m too busy looking at something else that’s beautiful.”

  She blushed and he loved her all the more.

  “I might have to move you out of your job, Kitty,” he confessed.

  She was horrified. She had visions of being sacked.

  “What do you mean?” Anxiety showed on her face.

  “I’m a wealthy man, with a certain image to maintain.” Though he spoke with the hint of a smile, there was a serious expression in his eyes.

  “It goes without saying that a man in my position would not want his wife working in a dreary office.”

  “I’m not your wife.” Now she realised what he was get ting at. She also realised she had been foolish to agree to come on this trip.

  “I’m asking you to marry me. Kitty.” His hand was still clutching hers and his blue eyes were intent on her face.

  “What do you say? Will you make me very happy and name a date?”

  “Why not?” He was persistent.

  “Personal reasons,” she said impatiently.

  “I don’t want to talk about it.” It was because of Harry, of course, but that was none of Jack’s business.

  He laughed.

  “It can’t be another man! I don’t allow you e
nough time to have a social life.”

  “Like I said…I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Later then?” He was like a dog with a bone. Searching for an answer that would not hurt him too much. Kitty was relieved when they turned on to a main road and he was forced to divert both his hand and his attention from her.

  Yet she knew this was not over. She had witnessed his dogged determination when negotiating a deal. Jack was not a man to give up lightly.

  It was midday when they arrived in the picturesque village of Elsworth.

  “We’ll do the deal,” he told her as they pulled into the Tanner boatyard.

  “Later, maybe we can take in the sights.” He winked at her.

  “I’m in no hurry to get back.”

  All eyes turned their way as he parked the streamlined Jaguar.

  “A car like this speaks for you,” he said as he locked the doors.

  “It reflects success…tells people you’re a man who can’t afford to waste time.” He was immensely proud of his car and his status.

  As they walked up the steps to the office. Kitty was enchanted. The boatyard was situated off the River Hamble in a natural lagoon formed by an extravagant curve where the river meandered. Its perimeter was lined with blossoming shrubs set in neat rows that rose and fell like the pattern on the edge of a pie-crust.

  Inside the lagoon there were many sailing vessels: boats with their sails rolled high, streamlined cruisers with fly-bridges atop and spacious sun decks beneath, and moored all around in the water were a number of smaller boats, rubber dinghies and wooden-hulled vessels of the older kind. Beneath a clear blue sky and brilliant sunshine, it made a very pretty picture.

  There was a wonderful sense of peace here, a certain timelessness.

  Kitty had felt the same atmosphere at the boatyard. It was a deeply pleasing, soothing sensation.

  The vessel Jack hoped to buy was a fifty-foot cruiser; with every conceivable extra already fitted. It had four well-equipped cabins, two fore and two aft, and was outfitted with the best that money could buy. The yard manager took them over it, extolling its virtues and going into great detail about the equipment that had cost the owner a small fortune.

  Jack was impressed.

  “It’s a good boat,” he told the yard manager. “I think we might be able to come to a deal…depending, of course, on whether the price is acceptable to me.”